Since both of us moved to UK after marriage, the settling down process took its toll and we initially felt that this stress was the main factor obstructing us in our progress towards having kids? Meanwhile, we resorted to medical aid in UK despite a lot of financial hardships. We had 2 IUI attempts and one abandoned IVF in UK with no success. The infusion of so many hormones and the stress of maintaining a job had its toll on me emotionally and my relation with my husband got affected-I had mood swings, bouts of depression etc. After another year, my husband started thinking of adoption. I was not averse to the idea myself. In fact, I wanted to have a baby of each race in my house; they all have their unique beauties. But my great faith in medicine was not ready to accept the fact that we can't have our own kids when we both were medically fit. I knew that my biological clock was almost dying but why rob my husband of the joy? So I started scanning the internet and zeroed in to two Doctors in India.
I chose India because I am still an Indian at heart and there was definitely less Red Tape. Moreover, I knew that I would have to take an egg donor and the legal system in India allowed anonymity of the egg donor for life time unlike UK where the child has the right to know the donors at a later stage.
No doubt, we were initially very hesitant to get any treatment in India mainly because of lack of secrecy and a broad understanding on the advances of medicinal science from family. We were not confident about how good the Indian medical professionals may be though they have made quite a niche in UK and USA. As you know bad news travels faster and influences a person more. However, the doctors in UK informed me that there was nothing wrong with my reproductive system or with my husband's and that it was a matter of time when God would bless us.
The two doctors chosen by me were Dr. N, and Dr. Aniruddha Malpani, Mumbai. I emailed both the doctors. I had to remind Dr. N to respond to my emails on a very bad mobile network whereas Dr. Malpani replied the very next day.
Dr. N simply said,' Come over, we can do it.' I was aghast; how is it possible without asking any preliminaries like my age, my physiological state, medical updates or reports etc. I had also put an enquiry on Dr. N's website that was picked up by some agent of theirs in UK who dealt with European queries due to language problems. However, my sixth sense said, NO.'
I was very impressed by Dr. Malpani's responsive behaviour and professional attitude. I sent him umpteen queries to which he responded with all patience. I even asked him point blank why he was more expensive than others and I liked his confidence when he replied that he knows that they are the best. We planned each and every thing in great detail as we had very limited time. Because of all this planning, I was able to traverse practically all the four corners of India with my other engagements within four weeks without affecting my treatment. This was possible because I was able to contact Dr. Malpani by email or by phone wherever, I was and also kept sending him my results whist on his monitoring schedule. And if he was busy, he ensured that he returned my call or responded by email. Hats off to technology and the professionals who know how to use it in the right way!
I arrived in Bombay in the last 10 days of my Great India tour and was joined by my husband. Dr. Malpani had everything under control-my tests were coming fine, the donor was ready and my husband was in time.
Finally, the eggs were retrieved. There were 12 eggs. Three fertilised healthy embryos were then transferred into my uterus . I felt great being part of such a marvel in medical science.
Dr. Aniruddha Malpani and his wife Dr.Anjali Malpani, the embryologist, Dr Sai and the whole team of nurses and receptionists were very supportive. While transferring the embryos, Dr. Malpani asked me,' which god are you praying to?' However, I was too elated to pray at a time when I knew that a miracle is being performed and at that time I was more aware of the messenger of God-Dr. Malpani, than God himself. I knew that we would succeed. On reflection, I realised that actually I do believe in God as a power but I have not been able to give any particular name or face to any of the gods. I believe in all religions and specifically in Humanity and the doctor was the epitome of that. I had a few hours rest at the clinic. That night I dreamt two embryos were floating down into my body and nestling comfortably in my womb. So much for wishful thinking! I told my husband the next day and he brushed my talk aside saying,' Just leave it to God. At least we tried.' May be he was too scared to even think positive after all that we had gone through all these years. We flew back to UK after 3 days of the transfer. But I must say that though we had been on holidays before this one was the most relaxed and enjoyable holiday I ever had in my whole life. No family/relative obligations, no dinners to attend to, and no work obligations. We would get up in the morning leisurely and then hit the few selected restaurants for lunch, watch movies in theatres or walk around Taj and then come home late after dinner like we used to do in our courtship days.
Back at home in UK, we had to wait 14 days before I could go for a HCG blood test to confirm my Million Pound lottery and that day fell on a weekend and the surgery was closed. So my husband bought a Pregnancy test and I tested with baited breath and saw the blue line appear like a boon. It was unbelievable. In my previous tests I had thought that this Blue line never ever shows but there it was right in front of my eyes!!!
Further blood tests followed and then an early ultrasound confirmed that I was carrying twins. I had few problems initially with bleeding and lots of weakness that was well looked after by doctors in UK. All is going on fine now. My twins have started kicking-one is a quite one with gentle kicks while the other seems a bit aggressive-good complementary personalities, it seems! I am just praying for all to go well am eagerly awaiting the arrival of new joys in the family.
My advice to all those couples who are planning to go through the medical aid is that it is no use wasting time and money in IUI, if you really want a child, one should go for IVF straightaway. And no doubt, I would highly recommend Dr. Malpani and his team in Mumbai, India.